a chicken walks into the bar (exam)

Things are on the up and up--or so they seem. I have yet to say I hate my job and it's been a month. I think I've given up on dating again. I don't know what I do wrong, but my guess is I'm working the "hot slut" too hard. Who cares, right? I don't. Yes I do, because every other post is a recount of my severley pathetic dating life. Hmmm

I'm going back to the gym. This makes me happy. I was starting to feel a little fluffy around the edges--not good.

I'm getting a new housemate. How exciting. Her name is Amanda. If she ever reads my blog, she might be shocked at my next statement:

SHE'LL NEVER REPLACE A. HART aka Ray Wonder. I love Amanda (my former housemate). She began the Bar exam today. I think she's going to do well. Although I must admit these last few weeks her stress has been rubbing off on me and I'm freaked out about the Bar. Here's a bit of backstory. A. Hart was a third year law student when I moved in with her. I thought she was super smart--gifted, in fact (she hates that term). She is super smart, but then she began talking maddness about how she had no plans to practice. I thought this strange for someone who worked so hard to become Little Ms. Hastings. So we didn't talk about post-law school plans that often. She wowed me this past May when she started going on about the Bar and how she was going to take it. Long story short, today was a first day and she's been going crazy leading up to this event. I know she'll be a nut afterwards as well. But I have my fingers crossed that she rocks out with her ____our (ew). I just know she'll score well--she's gifted, remember?

In all of my warm wishes to one of my favorite people (in dee world), I also wish that she gets out of her seat (mid-exam) and starts clucking like a chicken. I don't know much about the law (well more than the average bear thanks to amanda), but I do know that chicken clucking at the right time can get you a good seat in a court house! I'm being ridiculous--did that even make sense? I'm going with no. This is stream of conciousness, which I'm not fond of. I'll stop now.

oh no dawling, keep the change

there are so many things i want. i'm sure it's a combination of living in consumer culture and the fact that my mother had no trouble (and still doesn't) with indulging me. on the "to have" list this week:

a) a mani
b) a new pair of red pumps
c) a knit red hat
d) new La Luz candles
e) sushi dinner

i'm sure all of it won't happen (in fact i'm positive it won't), but i like wanting things. however, the reason why it won't all come to pass is because of....yup, money! now why is it that we can't pay people in ice cream. there is plenty of it, it tastes better than pennies or dollar bills, and it leaves one with options. i mentioned to Amanda (jebus, i miss that girl) that when she returns i'm going to take her out for dessert at citizen cake. i'm going to dub that our date spot. i'm taking her there for a number of reasons (she likes it, i like it, it's quaint), but most of all i'm taking her there for payment. i'm repaying her in dessert for being one of my favorite people and i'm sure for some reason i owe her cash (i owe everyone, even the irs). she will be pleased with this form of payment, i'm sure. everyone is happy when you pay people in dessert be it ice cream, cupcakes, cookies, truffles, or rum balls.

*you may think this post is making no sense, but i like it...it's making my cavities hurt

It's a Monday. I feel those three words speak volumes to my mood this morning. It seems not amount of coffee is working, I'm not stimulated by the gossip, and I'm having incessant thoughts of crawling into my bed--and staying there until tomorrow. If anyone could see my face right now, they would notice me suffering for a case of "wonky eye." Sad, but true. I'm exhausted.

The following would probably help my cause:

a) an amusing phone call
b) an eight hour break
c) another day off
d) disco
e) le pod
f) Lindsay Lohan walking through the door
g) an all expense paid trip to Paris
h) someone calling and telling me that I had to move to la la land right now
i) a new haircut
j) Amanda telling me she's not going to move out
k) if it were pre-fourth of july weekend again
l) a call from that HAUTE bartender I met on friday
m) 5:00pm
n) being a work in my jammies


OMG, ok I"m being ridiculous. I need to get to work. If you have any ideas on how I can wake up please post. Happy Monday!

drink up

I'm finding that it's easiest for me to blog on Friday's. I get home from work and I'm way too tired, or too busy trying to keep social that I forget to keep you kids abreast. First things first--I love Madonna with all my purple heart (and no I didn't wow her with my pop-locking leotard skills). Second, I won't be going back to Vegas for a long time--so over spikey hair and big taddies.

Now, while I'm inclined to tell you all about my sudden desire to get a nose job, I won't. I think that I get bored and come up with weird things to want for myself. So we'll attribute any nose job talk to boredom.

I went out for drinks with some ex-coworkers last night. I really had a great time! Although, ex-coworker Shannon told me that I shouldn't drink hooker drinks. I ordered a Midori Sour. Another ex-coworker (and favorite person in SF), Nicholas told me that I should parttake in what he dubs "literary drinks," i.e. sidecars, g&t's, manhattans. I'm afraid of all three.

I like my hooker drinks!

Amanda has also said now that I'm approaching mid-twenties I need to stop acting as though red bull/vodkas are cocktails (I'm really eager to try tab w/ vodka). I get a lot of slack for my taste in music, do I have to catch heat for my taste in poison? Growing up is hard! So for an evening out you can usually find me sipping on things that make everyone but really big queens and Britney Spears gag. I enjoy buttery nipples, midori sours, lemon drops, espresso martinis, margaritas and anything with an umbrella and a sweet after-taste. I do love a kir royal as well (not a hooker drink). So I don't know what to say to this except at least you'll never catch me ordering a COZZZZ-MO-POLITUN!

life's little soundtrack

I've been treating "le blog" like a cyclops mormon stepchild from one of the dakotas. Very, not cool. Well, a post-desert drama session and a new job will make a gal do crazy things!

In latest and greatest news I've landed a new job, which means no more office bitch. I will be working for Avalon Publishing as their marketing assistant. This is such a "Jeffersons" moment I feel and I'm loving it. In other news, I'm wearing skinny jeans today and I feel fabo in them. I had a fear of skinny jeans, but they don't look as frightening on me as I had anticipated. I would like to incorporate more "skinny pants" into my wardrobe. I heart them.

And finally, I am no longer the last person in San Francisco sans iPod. I had some apprehension about the iPod. I felt like it possesed a great power that could tune me out to the other sounds of the city. However, I've found that it makes me more aware. To hear a sound over the trance beats spilling from "le pod" is quite impressive. I now feel like I can give my days soundtracks--something I've always longed for....

As a little girl, I had a thing for playing out my future in my head (I still do--although people like Ray Wonder call this my fantasy world in which perpetually dwell). I would sit in the passenger seat of my mother's car and daydream, but every daydream was accompanied by music. Whatever song tickeled my fancy, managed to make it's way into my thoughts. Now that I have "le pod," my longing for muscial accompaniment has come true. "Le pod" helps me to assess my day in the morning, tune out the halucinating barefoot woman on the 71L, write to music and (sadly) block out any maddness that has made it's way into my life (that particular day). I love it's name, "le pod"...so French.